chief108
17-10-2008, 20:50
There is a new saviour amongst mankind. It has been kept secret for decades right alongside the Roswell incident.... but it has recently been revealed to the public...
In 1949 a great Prophet descended from the heavens to bestow the love of the 6 Gods upon us. His name was Fakka. He healed the sick, walked on water, turned water into wine and even raised the dead. He travelled the land espousing his doctrine for all the world and proclaimed that the religions that everyone on Earth were following were false. He said that every false god worshipped by everyone must be denounced by all the people or else they would suffer in the eternal Buttsekstourmentia, the place where all evil people go when they die. We now know this is true because he wrote a book that we can all read called "The Retoddeddelusionsofareligiousnut". He told us this book was the word of the 6 Gods and was directly inspired by them.
And now, here is the clincher.......... the thing that makes it all true and indisputable....
In 1972 a coalition was formed. It had members from many of the prominent religions from around the world... Christians, Buddhists, Muslims, Scientologists, Jews, even atheists because they all felt he was a threat because his truth was undeniable!!!!! He knew they were against him and he even told them that it was all foretold in prophecy... he would die by their hand and then he would return and all of them would pay for their sins.
So they hit him over the head and put him in the back of a pick-up truck and drove him way down in Mississippi somewhere to a swamp and hung him. From this point on he was known as a Martyr. To this day millions still worship the Martyr Fakka. They sit on their porches at night drinking beer and awaiting the return of the Martyr Fakka. They look to the Martyr Fakka to bring them salvation, because all that deny the Martyr Fakka will forever suffer the torture that is Butsekstourmentia.
So, do you accept the Martyr Fakka as your saviour? Or do you wish to experience Butsekstourmentia for eternity?
ALL HAIL MARTYR FAKKA!!!! :beerchug:
In 1949 a great Prophet descended from the heavens to bestow the love of the 6 Gods upon us. His name was Fakka. He healed the sick, walked on water, turned water into wine and even raised the dead. He travelled the land espousing his doctrine for all the world and proclaimed that the religions that everyone on Earth were following were false. He said that every false god worshipped by everyone must be denounced by all the people or else they would suffer in the eternal Buttsekstourmentia, the place where all evil people go when they die. We now know this is true because he wrote a book that we can all read called "The Retoddeddelusionsofareligiousnut". He told us this book was the word of the 6 Gods and was directly inspired by them.
And now, here is the clincher.......... the thing that makes it all true and indisputable....
In 1972 a coalition was formed. It had members from many of the prominent religions from around the world... Christians, Buddhists, Muslims, Scientologists, Jews, even atheists because they all felt he was a threat because his truth was undeniable!!!!! He knew they were against him and he even told them that it was all foretold in prophecy... he would die by their hand and then he would return and all of them would pay for their sins.
So they hit him over the head and put him in the back of a pick-up truck and drove him way down in Mississippi somewhere to a swamp and hung him. From this point on he was known as a Martyr. To this day millions still worship the Martyr Fakka. They sit on their porches at night drinking beer and awaiting the return of the Martyr Fakka. They look to the Martyr Fakka to bring them salvation, because all that deny the Martyr Fakka will forever suffer the torture that is Butsekstourmentia.
So, do you accept the Martyr Fakka as your saviour? Or do you wish to experience Butsekstourmentia for eternity?
ALL HAIL MARTYR FAKKA!!!! :beerchug: