Beyond Redneck

[chief108]

You might be a Y3K redneck IF...

Quick and easy travel to the moon and beyond is now possible due to your invention: the 128-Barrel Carburetor.
You're so inbred, you're cloning.
You celebrate the 1,065th birthday of Elvis by waiting to spot him at the McSoylent Green drive thru.
Translator microbes convert everything you say to "Y'all" and "Grits."
You think Ford stands for "Flying Orbital Radioactive Disaster."
You fly 4.8 light years to burn a cross in front of the pod of a small, blue, sluglike creature, only to find his atmosphere does not support combustion.
Resistance of you is futile because you are Skoal Borg.
Your anti-gravity hovercraft has enormous, useless rubber wheels.
Despite the fact that your trailer is made of space-age polymers, and is orbiting Earth, you still burn it down by smoking in bed.
You voted for Governor Bear Bryant the 85th.
A wormhole has allowed you to be your own father, brother and step-nephew.
You strain your neck whittling nanites.
You met your boyfriend while he was serving five life sentences in cryogenic freeze. ("I know you caint hear me, but I luuuuv you!")
You use a molecular transport to beam in deer at point-blank range. *BLAM*
The bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms, time travel, anti-gravity, and androids, busts up your corn liquor still for the 10,000th time.
Your government allotted holographic memory cube is full of every episode of Crook & Chase, and Roland Martin Fishing, since 2920.
You grill your meat pills.

[chief108]

You might be a Chinese redneck IF...

You were born in the year of the armadillar.
You serve your family Moo goo guy deer and they eat it with dipsticks.
Everybody at Gilley's was kung foo drinkin' and their kicks were fast as white lightening. (Don't forget that expert timing... It was a little bit frightening).
You drive an red Dodge Charger with yellow stars on top called the General Bruce Lee.
You open up a fortune pork rind that said "Love your Mother and Sister" (in bed with no clothes on).
You're ready for vienna sausages an hour after you ate the last batch.
Your porch collapses, kills 5 dogs, and you eat them.
You've kept away the mongol hoards for a thousand years with a chicken wire fence you can see from space.
After a night of drinking you go "sailin' down the yellow river."
You joke that your family has more Waynes than a Chinese phonebook.
You have fifteen rusting bicycles in your front yard.
Your mudflaps have the silhouette of a plain-clothes slave-labor factory worker.
You use fireworks to chase away evil spirits, and your neighbor's chow.
Your elementary school has a fire drill and everyone runs from one portable to another.
You loan two panda bears to San Diego Zoo called "Meemaw" and "Lu-lu."

[chief108]

You might be a Paranormal redneck IF...

The walls of your trailer are bleeding Jack Daniels. (This may have resulted from a party.)
Beer coozies and ammo keep flying around your living room.
Your daughter puts her hands on the working TV screen and says, "They'z Here!"
A ghost flies through you, and you wind up covered in Vienna Sausage gel.
You open the fridge, see the hounds from hell, and feed them scraps.
You're the only one in the neighborhood without a car on blocks because ancient Indian graves keep shooting up out of the ground.
Your friends call it B.O., but you call it an energy field.
Your ouija board can't spell.
You keep your minnows in the ecto-containment unit.
When you head for the kitchen, your wife says "Don't go into the Bud Light!"
No matter how many times you have Tammy's name airbrushed on your Camaro's front tag, the next morning it always says Christine.
If you conjure a spirit by chanting "Tobacco juice, Tobacco juice, Tobacco juice!"
If Gozer says, "Your thoughts will choose the method of destruction for all of humanity," and it's Roland Martin.
You scare your cousin out of your house by "entering his body."
You're allowed in the press box to relay coaching tips from the Bear to Mike DuBose.
You do pest control for Katherine Windom Tucker and you end up containing Jeffery.

[chief108]

You might be a Mr. Rogers redneck IF...

Your cousin is Mr. McFeely, and he got his name in the County Lockup.
The trolley has mud flaps with silhouettes of naked women, and a 4 barrel carb.
On every show you have to feed the catfish.
Picture-picture only shows the Dukes of Hazzard.
King Friday's castle is made out of beer cans.
If the Arts & Crafts in the kitchen segment is always rollin' your own or tying flies.
Henrietta Pussycat's most common saying is "Meow-meow a goddamned beer. Meow-meow fishing."
You encourage viewers by saying "You go to that special school because you're you. No one has the same number of chromosomes as you."
You sing "I have always wanted to have a neighbor, within three miles..."
The trolley only whistles when it's backing up.
You stole the only stoplight in your hometown to put next to your fish tank.
All of the field trips are to the B.F. Goodrich Plant to drink a beer with Y.C.
If you wear hip waders, thermal underwear, a camouflage vest, a fluorescent orange hat, and a comfortable, pastel sweater.
For your show to continue its corporate underwriting, Mr. Rogers has to dip Copenhagen every so often.
The Land of Make Believe is ruled by King Friday, Prince Tuesday, and Duke Sunday Blue Laws.
All of the little, model homes have little model trailer hitches and get swept away by little model tornados.

[chief108]

You might be a Monica Lewinsky redneck IF...

Every limo that drives you to the grand jury has an airbrush unicorn tag that says Monica 'n' Handsome.
To show support on your testimony day, he wore that leather belt with "Wild Bill" burned on it.
You're disappointed that the Bama Fever store doesn't sell berets.
You used a phone card, at a pay phone, for phone sex.
Jerry Springer's security has to separate you and the First Lady ("You need to leave him, honey! He's a dawg! Kick him to da curb!").
Instead of a valentine in the Washington Post, you paint him a mural on the tailgate of your pickup.
The President claims no sexual relations with you, and therefore no purgery, 'cuz you ain't even related.
Your father threatens his own shotgun censure or impeachment by a boot in the ass.
You gave a B.J., while he's on the C.B. (with Sonny, no less!)
You've ever thought "Altoids hell!! Hot 'n' Spicy pork rinds!!!"
While climaxing during phone sex, you make the President yell "I'm a Beech Nut NUUUUUUUUT!"
Your boss inserts, and then removes from your privates, a wad of Red Man chewin' tobacco. (Ooo-wee, that tastes good!)
The FBI analyses your blue crackeroos outfit and finds traces of beer, tobacco, gun powder, red Alabama clay, paw prints, brake dust, deisel fumes, manure, butane, cedar chips, Fancy Full hair dye, Aqua Net hair spray, Ultra-perm, Tropay blue eye-shadow, Wet 'n' Wild lipstick, 10W/30, Avon perfume, Mad Dog 20/20, Virginia Slim ashes, kool-aid, baby spit-up, corn silk, thigh cream, stink bait, Ol Roy dog food, AND semen!
If the prez hurts your feelings with the nickname Lulu.
If you get the president to replace "Hail to the Chief" with y'all's song: Garth Brooks' "The Dance."

[chief108]

You might be an MTV redneck IF...

You are one of 12 Angry, White-hooded Veiwers that lynch Mariah Carey for that Butterfly video.
More than 3 of your relatives are named Jimmy Ray.
Uncle Matt Pinfield can tell you about everyone that ever recorded at the Grand Ole Opry - and what label they were on.
Road Rules consists of cruising the parking lot of your dad's Cracker Barrel franchise.
Cindi Crawford hosts your favorite Salvation Army Fashion Show.
Spring Break '98 is at yet another KOA campground.
You and Dr. Drew won't take a call about incest because it's too boring. (We asked Dr. Drew about the g-spot, and he thought we wanted a $1,000 loan).
You operate a nationwide cable TV station, but rent-to-own a TV.
You rock the vote to elect Strom Thurmond and Buck Owens.
Your turkey would have won first place on the 1998 MTV Blue-Ribbon Livestock Awards Show, except for Fiona Apple's last-minute entry.
You blur all video and bleep all audio references to education.
You suggest any of the following top 10 video categories:

* Videos with Sexy Animals
* Truck Videos
* Songs with Line Dance potential
* Videos with Colored Girls that ain't half bad

Between videos, you show a lot of ads for Fake Candy Cigarettes, Moonpies, and Big League Chewin' Gum.
You're going to have to take care of Puff Daddy because he remixed your song, "Boot Scootin' Boogie."
If Jerry Springer… Oh, hell. Jerry Springer anything!

[chief108]

You might be a Batman redneck IF...

Your costume has rubber nipples AND a rubber butt crack.
You put more cinder blocks under one side of your trailer 'cause you like that angled camera effect.
You change the sound effects WHAM! BOP! And KA-BLAM! To: HOCK! SPIT! and KER-POOT!
In your first movie, Jack Nicholson says "Stop the truck, who is that?"
Your bat tractor converts to a bad-ass bat bass boat.
You shine your silhouette on deer before you shoot them.
You like Robin's mask 'cause it shows off his pretty mouth.
The Riddler's toughest question for you is "who's yer daddy?"
You've ever lived under an overpass and called it the Batcave.
Your high-tech utility belt holds a batwrench, bat air guage, and a bat coozie.
You stop fightin' freeze for one reason & one reason only: ICE COLD BEER!
You ever used the batarang to scale the side of a water tower.
You've ever been tempted by the evil bobcat woman.
The soundtrack to your new movie contains the following songs:

* Freebat - Lynyrd Skynyrd
* Linedance - The Queer formerly known as Prince
* My Home's in Gotham City - Alabamer
* Kiss from a Sister - Sealant
* The 4th Down Is the 1st Down Is the 4th Down - Smashin' Punkins
* Kill Me, Gut Me, Cook Me, Mount Me - Y'all 2

[chief108]

You might be a Muppet redneck IF...

You get heckled by two old men in a balcony named Pinkard & Bowden.
You beat up Bert & Ernie because you're convinced they're living in sin.
Animal plays a washboard.
You sing "it's not easy being wintergreen."
Instead of "breaker breaker one niner" you say "wocka wocka one niner."
You end up on that Cops show 'cause your wife the pig is karate-chopping you.
You see Gonzo's relationship with the chickens as perfectly normal.
You hate homos, but you always have a hand up your butt.
You go to KFC and get the Sam The Eagle Bucket.
All your human guest hosts have appeared on TNN.
You do a comedy bit called "Pigs in Vance." (Insert the name of a redneck town near you!)
Your porch collapses and kills Rowlf.

[chief108]

You might be a Monty Python redneck IF...

("And now for something completely country…")

You've ever ordered a crunchy frog and spam omlet at the Huddle House.
You've ever returned to a flea market and said "This coon dog was stone dead when I bought it!"
The PO-lice shoot you with a 12 gauge and you say it's just a flesh wound.
Your brother bought another trailer and now is known as Bubba "2 sheds" Wiggins.
Every time you say "mattress" your co-worker puts a spittoon on his head.
You've never realised it's funny that your name is Mr. Dip Too Much.
You follow every comment about your sister with a "wink wink" and a "nudge nudge."
You had to haggle for your rats tail.
You bang two Krager rims together to pretend you have a truck.
You've ever done yard work for the Knights Who Say "Y'all."
You've armed your compound against attacks from killer sheep.
You want the right to have yunggins and be called Loretta Lynn.
You now drive a Chevy truck but you're pinin' for the Fords.
Your truck horn plays a certain John Philip Sousa song.
Your silly walk started a new line dance on The Nashville Network.
Your favorite song is "Sit in My Truck and Tell Me That You Love Me."

[chief108]

You might be a Beverly Hills redneck IF...

Your Rolex has a camoflouge wristband.
You hired an illegal alien to take your coon dogs to their therapist.
You're having Bubba Jr. tutored by Heidi Fleiss.
You have an NRA Goldcard.
You own the entire "Smokey and the Bandit" series on laserdisc.
You use your carfax to send your buddies naked pictures of your wife.
You snort cocaine through rolled up confederate money.
You know how to say gun oil in Japanese.
You hired a professional decorator to arrange your lawn ornaments.
You have a tatoo that says, "My other tatoo is a Nagel original."
You had your lip enlarged so it could hold more skoal.
You paid $2 million at an auction for a bottle of '68 Ripple.
Your map to the homes of the stars only shows Lee Greenwood's house.
Your wife said she bought a Volvo and you thought she had surgery.
You've ever been too drunk to sue.
The theme song at your daughter's debutante ball was "Friend's In Low Places".
You let Kato Kaelin sleep in your barn.

[chief108]

You might be a Gangsta Redneck IF...

When Bubba Jr. acts up, you take him out to the barn & bust a cap in his ass.
You can stuff your shorts in your boots, or your cowboy hat under your hood.
You do drive-bys with a huntin' spotlight.
A 12 pound bass flashes you the proper gang sign, and you throw him back.
During a riot, you loot Mack's Bait Shop.
You have 10 switches on your horse.
You have hair like 2 Pac up front, and like George Clinton in the back.
Your huntin' dog has a heavy gold choke chain.
You spray paint gang slogans on the outside of your own trailer.
Your name contains both "MC" and "Jr."
You think bitches and hos are dogs and gardening tools.
You climb a water tower with your "nine" to defend yo mamma's honor.
You give props to the Hatfields and front on the McCoys.
The truck you drive is an O.G. Mack, and your 8-track is a wanna-be player.

[chief108]

You might be a Redneck Cat IF...

You sharpen your claws on panelling and shag carpet.
You answer to "Fluffy Bob."
You burn a cross in front of a dog house.
You put a pinch of Friskies between your cheek & gum.
You have to go outside to use a litterbox with a crescent moon on it.
The fur on your head is really short, and the fur on your tail is really long.
You have catnip keggers.
There's a mouse-shaped imprint on your back pocket.
The outside of your entire trailer is covered with carpeting.
You use liver & tuna Copenhagen.
Gramaw calls everyone to the dinner table with the sound of a can opener.
Your favorite snack food is "Yee-hah Mix."
You can't hook up the satellite dish 'cause you keep on playin' with the cords.
You arch your back & hiss when the ATF surrounds your compound.
You just can't admit you're a pussy.

[chief108]

You might be a Gilligan's Island Redneck IF...

You often complement your little buddy on his "pretty mouth."
There's more genetic diversity among the castaways than in your entire hometown.
You're constantly sayin' "Hey Skipper, you up for a beer run?...oh wait a minute."
You had to take just a 2-hour tour 'cause you can't count no higher.
All native islanders look the same to you.
You're sure you'll be rescued soon 'cause you've been callin' for help on CB channel 9.
You find a way to bring your kids back t-shirts that say "I was stranded on Gilligan's Island and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."
You make Gilligan run around the island with fake antlers during deer season.
The SS Minnow crashed right after you said "Hey y'all watch this."
You're the only one not bothered by wearin' the same pants for a year.
Despite the fact you're on a deserted island, you still manage to find an airbrush stand.
You had a moonshine still built before the others were even off the boat.
You won't give up askin' Mary Ann & Ginger to mud wrestle.
To feel more at home, you put wheels under everybody's hut.
The boat's not repaired yet 'cause you made the Professor fix you up a satellite dish.
You like hangin' out at the Howells' 'cause they have a double-wide hut.
Lookin' at coconuts makes you homesick for the bowling alley.

[chief108]

You might be a Jesus Redneck IF...

You teach your disciples to line dance.
You ever wore a thorny Stetson.
You do your float fishin' without a boat.
You can feed an entire trailer park with one crappe and a moon-pie.
The wise men brought you goldschlager, frank'n'beans, and grits.
You have a black velvet painting of yourself.
You like to go by God Jr. or Little God.
The holy grail is a baseball helmet with side mounted beer cans.
You refuse to walk on water 'cause it will ruin your snakeskins.
You said "This Skoal is my body, dip it. This beer is my blood, funnel it."
After a 3 day drunk, you "ascended" to Bradford Parkside. (a local addiction treatment center)
Your last days were captured on Real Stories of the Highway Centurions.
You refuse a bar fight at Gilley's and end up nailed to a jukebox.

[chief108]

You might be a NASA redneck IF...

You insist on lining the shuttle cargo bay with astroturf.
You take really big binoculars with you in orbit to look through girls windows.
Your genitals exploded when you went to the bathroom outside.
You're constantly dodging floating spheres of tobacco juice.
You're mad because the shuttle ground effects you installed burned off in re-entry.
You performed an unscheduled spacewalk to paint over the word "Atlantis" with the words "General Lee."
Burritos become your personal in-cabin propultion system.
You annoy Houston by constantly askin' for a smokey report.
You've ever said any of the following things over the com link with ground control:
Houston, this thing done broke!
Whoops, my bad, over.
I got yer booster rocket right here.
Hey y'all, watch this.
You took a job with ground control, then began shopping for a lawn mower.
You drink Twang.
You have a ten-gallon space helmet.
The Hubble Space Telescope has you and your girlfriends initials on it.

[chief108]

You might be a McDonald's redneck IF...

All your extra value meals come with 1 meat and 3 vegetables.
Your drive thru window is up really really high.
Your restaurant playground has a trampoline and a rope over a creek.
You're still asking the county to issue you a McLiquor liscence.
You're a proud sponsor of the Confederate States Olympic Synchronized Bass Fishing Team.
You sell happy meals that come with a broken glass bottle and a whittlin' knife.
You keep burgers warm under a bug zapper.
Big Mac is your restaurant owner's name and the vehicle you drive.
Instead of "super size it," you say "jack it up."
You're always required to say "coffee's hot, so don't tump it over."
When taking drive thru orders, you always say "break one nine."
You wrote your TV commercial slogan "Whopper got you down? Snap into a Big Mac!"
You sell any of the following menu items:
Chitlin' Nuggets
Filet-o-crawdaddy
Goats Milkshake
Superbowl Sundae
McRoadkill
Croissammich
You have giant floppy boots and an orange mullet head.

[chief108]

You might be an environmentalist redneck IF...

The aluminum mining industry collapses when you begin recycling your Budweiser cans.
You're not much help in the "Save the Forest" movement 'cause you're awestruck by chainsaws.
Your idea of Greenpeace is gettin' some on St. Patrick's Day.
Your electric car has dual exhaust.
You try to prevent global warming with a "Hands Across Duncanville" campaign. (another small rednecky town here in Alabama)
You choose paper or plastic to match the rest of your luggage.
You have your family cookout in your living room to protect the atmosphere.
You splash the contents of your spit cup on people wearing fur.
Your belt buckle doubles as a solar cooker.
You no longer warm your squirrel meat in the microwave because of the anti-nuke campaign.
Animal testing, to you, means "playing the field."
You're tormented by confusion over the acronyms for World Wildlife Fund and World Wrestling Federation.
You sell "possum safe" venison.
You think "o-zone" is a great place to touch your girlfriend.
You're against clubbing Seal -- except at the Grammys!
You think CFC stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken.

[chief108]

You might be a James Bond redneck IF...

Her majesty only issued you a liscence to fish.
Your belt buckle conceals a rocket launcher.
Your El Camino can drive underwater.
You used to be played by Sean Connery and are now played by Jerry Reed.
Double-0 Seven is your junior high school GPA.
You attend a royal banquet in a sleeveless tuxedo.
You change your code name to 30 aught 7.
You shoot the bad guys from a tree stand.
Your sex life is so bad, you call your wife "Dr. No."
You can't even spell M.
Q gets most of his supplies from the JC Whitney catalog.
You've ever starred in one of the following movies...
From Elrod with Love
Thunderbird
On Her Majesty's Water Bed
The Spy Who Loved Me, So I Kicked His Ass
Leafraker
For White Folks Only
Octopussy
At the start of a movie, you turn dramatically toward the camera and spit.

[chief108]

You might be a Vampire redneck IF...

You have a huge blood belly.
Your coffin has running boards.
On your porch, you have a stack of empty beer cans with puncture holes.
You can't see your reflection in your belt buckle.
You insist that your boots don't look funny when you turn into a bat.
You have to go outside the castle to use the bathroom.
You're still mad at your brother for putting garlic in your Skoal.
All but your two fangs are missing.
You keep flying into your bugzapper.
Anyone who has ever pulled your finger has wound up dead.
Your flannel cape is clipped to your polyester button-down.
You dream of seeing Elvira slip on some Daisies and a tube top.
You got your hunting license renewed just in time for Virgin season.
You're organizing an army of the undead in case the ATF attacks.
Your favorite thing about immortality is that you will get to see "Wrestlemania 4,000,000."
You scared yourself away while trying to burn a cross in front of Blackula's house.

[chief108]

You might be a Doctor redneck IF...

Being on call means waiting by the CB.
You wear a toolbelt in the operating room.
Your one cure for everything is Goody's Headache powder and a Bud Light.
Your idea of scrubbing is pickin' the grease from under your fingernails.
You can't deliver a baby without snickerin' like Rosco from Dukes of Hazard.
You ordered your degree from Sally Struthers.
Your waiting room only has back issues of Field & Stream and Hot Rod.
You keep a Zippo handy to make rectal exams more fun.
The second floor staff is still mad at you for the monster wheelchair rally.
You couldn't get a donor heart to a patient 'cause all the coolers were filled with beer.
You wear an "Official Breast Inspector" cap to do mammograms.
Your ambulance siren plays "Dixie."
You shoot a deer and then bring him back to life.
All you work on is shotgun wounds and lip cancer.
Your anesthesiologist uses Pure Grain Alcohol and a ball peen hammer.
Your prescriptions are unusable 'cause you don't even have handwriting.

[chief108]

You might be a Lawyer redneck IF...

You thought the bar exam involved beer & pretzels.
You instruct your client to plead the 5th... of Jack Daniels!
The bumper sticker on your Camaro reads "Janet Reno is my Co-pilot."
You try to win over the jury by lettin' 'em pet yer coon dog.
Your so-called suit & tie is a camoflauge jacket & a rebel flag bandana.
You don't mind clients paying you with livestock.
Your office can be pulled behind a truck.
You think an oral pleading is when you ask your wife to get kinky.
You're held in contempt 'cause you keep callin' the judge "The little lady."
You do legal research by calling the Psychic Friends Network and the 700 club.
When the judge enters the chamber, you play the People's Court theme on your banjo.
You handle an inordinate number of moonshine cases.
You find your clients by watching "Real Stories of the Highway Patrol."
You help your brother file for divorce against your mother.

[chief108]

You might be an Eskimo redneck IF...

You keep callin' your sister a whale, then askin' to see her blow hole.
The kayak in front of your igloo is up on blocks.
You refer to Santa Claus as "That damned Yankee!"
You're dissapointed that the Ididerod isn't a tractor pull.
Your big shiny belt buckle says, "Don't mess with Tundra!"
You've ever driven a snowmobile into the top of a tree.
You still try to make your wife laugh by demanding she bring you a "cold one."
Your sled dogs are all shivering basset hounds.
Most of your "ZZ Top-style" beard is frozen tobacco spit.
To keep warm, you get your friends to pull your finger.
You always have hypothermia 'cause you ain't wearin one of them sissy fur coats.
You have six hundred words for snow but you can't spell any of them.
You're always bitchin' at your kids for using the satellite dish as a toboggan.
You think your neighbor has a bigger bugzapper when you see the Northern Lights.
When your mechanic says you blew a seal, you swear it's just frost on your moustache.

[chief108]

You might be a Santa Claus redneck IF...

You AND the reindeer go outside to use the bathroom.
You bitch because boot cut jeans don't come in red.
Your elves are the kids that you had with your sister.
You move your operation to the South Pole for obvious reasons.
Mrs. Claus has to read the list and check it twice.
Because of prior events, state authorities won't let kids sit in your lap.
On your last hunting trip, you shot the Easter Bunny.
You're extra nice to the kids who leave Fried Chicken and Beer.
You don't know nothin' about no dancin' sugar plums.
You think the elves make great line dancers.
You're still trying to round up enough participants for a monster sleigh rally.
Your CB handle is "Big Bowl of Jelly".
You entered a picture of Mrs. Claus in "Beaver Hunt".
You wear mistletoe on your belt buckle. (C'mon, honey and kiss Santa!)
You practice your steer roping on Vixen (if you know what I mean).
Rudolph has a shiny red nose and a neon license plate.

[chief108]

You might be a Presidential Candidate redneck IF...

You promise to take the wheels off the new White House.
You made your campaign tour in a custom conversion van.
All of your campaign bumper stickers say "Vote Bubba in '97."
You promise to change the national anthem to "If the South Woulda' Won."
You propose to solve the Middle East problem by "openin' up a big ol' can o' Whoop-Ass on 'em."
You waive secret service protection 'cause you ain't no sissy boy.
Your idea of media coverage is spray painting your name on overpasses.
Your most famous line at the debate was, "Nuh-uh!"
You challenge each and every Congresman to some real professional rasslin'.
You promise to repeal all BUT the second amendment.
You think the party convention should be at the Grand Ol' Opry.
Your Vice Presidential choice is Duke, your huntin' dog.
You get all ticked off 'cause the current President wouldn't let you ride up front in Air Force One.
Your brother Roger's singing career is ruining your image.

[chief108]

You might be a Star Wars Redneck IF...

Your X-Wing Fighter has a rebel flag.
After too many beers, you see the ghost of Obi-Wan.
Darth Vader is your father AND your brother.
You only learned to use the force when you lost the remote control.
Your plan to blow up the Death Star involes a cigarette, 2 M-80s, and a gallon of your grandma's moonshine.
Your favorite song is "Space Boot Scootin' Boogie" by Jabba Ray Hut.
You take your huntin' wookie out lookin' for Ewoks.
You think C3PO sounds like one of them queer gay talkin' homos.
You don't care if the princess is your sister.
Your land cruiser bumper sticker says "You can have my light saber when you pry it from my cold dead hand."
You refer to the Death Star as the Federal Building.

[chief108]

You might be a Gay Redneck IF...

Your porch collapses and you kill more than three poodles.
You drink a beer with your pinkie finger raised.
You keep a parasol in your gunrack.
You refer to your fishin' buddy as your bitch.
You're constantly redecorating your brother's trailer.
You suggest to your huntin' buddy that he should add highlights.
The horn on your truck plays showtunes from broadway.
You think Jeff Foxworthy is Macho-yummy!
You find yourself voguing to Cotton-eyed Joe.

[Muay Thai Elite]

Nu weet ik het zeker, Chief is een bot..

[chief108]

http://wuzzadem.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/postbot1.gif

[Muay Thai Elite]

Ik heb gisteren Wall E op Joox zitten kijken, damn moet eerlijk zeggen dat ik m nog leuk vond ook....

[chief108]

heb Wall-E in de bios gezien... :p

[Muay Thai Elite]

Geef toe, je vond m leuk. Vooral toen Evaaaaaa en Wall E gingen praten met elkaar..

[chief108]

You might be a Wall-E Redneck IF...

[Muay Thai Elite]

Ik geilde ook wel op dat robotje..