chief108
20-03-2009, 12:31
bron: Nuclear Family Warhead Why Does Spandex Come In XXL? (http://nuclearfamilywarhead.com/2008/07/14/why-does-spandex-come-in-xxl/)
http://nuclearfamilywarhead.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/kneevage-2.jpg
This picture has obviously been photo-shopped, but it’s apparent that the girl is overly blessed in the chest without the photo-shop help, and it brings up a good point. At what point do you need to be told that something you’re wearing just isn’t attractive? For example; I’ve gained enough weight over the last few years to understand that tight fitting shirts with horizontal lines just aren’t a good idea. I haven’t worn a rugby shirt since 1989. I’ve been wearing my shirts un-tucked since the 90’s, I get it; unfortunately, there are a lot of people who don’t. Do we need Chuck Schumer to subpoena that girl in the bikini to find out why she would subject small children and families to such a sight? If he can bring down a bank, he can bring down her hem-line. Should the Beach Patrol be allowed to hand out tickets for gross negligence? In this case, I’d say yes. Common sense should be your guide, but then, most of us won’t admit that we have a problem until it’s too late. It takes that trip to the grocery store when you bump into someone you haven’t seen in years and they say; “Look at you! When is the baby due?” You notice a few things wrong with their question:
Your youngest child is 12.
You are 43.
You are a man.
If you’re still not sure; number 3 is the give-away. Just remember; if you know that you have “gained a few pounds” but still feel like you haven’t gained that much, have someone take a full body length picture of you or film you with a video camera. Now; take an objective look. Scary, isn’t it? We can all make our faces look skinnier when we lean into the mirror over the vanity, but the camera doesn’t lie. They say the camera adds 10 pounds. How many cameras does it appear were used to photograph you?
We can all do our part to alleviate issues like kneevage girl up there. If you’re going to wear spandex, make sure you can pull it off first; if not, then please wear something over it! I wear spandex, but they are Under Armour compression shorts worn UNDER a pair of regular shorts. I wear them on the rare occasion that I work out, not as a fashion statement like some 250+somethings. I have no desire to look like the Polish bicycle team or an Olympic swimmer. Ladies, if you are going to shop for a bikini, please take the BMI (Body Mass Index) chart (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_mass_index) with you! If you are in the 90th percentile, please shop for a one piece. Think of your family. Gentlemen, you’re not European and you’re not a world class swimmer, put the Speedo back on the rack and go look for something in a floral pattern that will end at the knee caps. Web netting inside is optional, unless your suit ends mid-thigh, then it is mandatory. Kids go to your pool for cryin’ out loud.
http://nuclearfamilywarhead.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/kneevage-2.jpg
This picture has obviously been photo-shopped, but it’s apparent that the girl is overly blessed in the chest without the photo-shop help, and it brings up a good point. At what point do you need to be told that something you’re wearing just isn’t attractive? For example; I’ve gained enough weight over the last few years to understand that tight fitting shirts with horizontal lines just aren’t a good idea. I haven’t worn a rugby shirt since 1989. I’ve been wearing my shirts un-tucked since the 90’s, I get it; unfortunately, there are a lot of people who don’t. Do we need Chuck Schumer to subpoena that girl in the bikini to find out why she would subject small children and families to such a sight? If he can bring down a bank, he can bring down her hem-line. Should the Beach Patrol be allowed to hand out tickets for gross negligence? In this case, I’d say yes. Common sense should be your guide, but then, most of us won’t admit that we have a problem until it’s too late. It takes that trip to the grocery store when you bump into someone you haven’t seen in years and they say; “Look at you! When is the baby due?” You notice a few things wrong with their question:
Your youngest child is 12.
You are 43.
You are a man.
If you’re still not sure; number 3 is the give-away. Just remember; if you know that you have “gained a few pounds” but still feel like you haven’t gained that much, have someone take a full body length picture of you or film you with a video camera. Now; take an objective look. Scary, isn’t it? We can all make our faces look skinnier when we lean into the mirror over the vanity, but the camera doesn’t lie. They say the camera adds 10 pounds. How many cameras does it appear were used to photograph you?
We can all do our part to alleviate issues like kneevage girl up there. If you’re going to wear spandex, make sure you can pull it off first; if not, then please wear something over it! I wear spandex, but they are Under Armour compression shorts worn UNDER a pair of regular shorts. I wear them on the rare occasion that I work out, not as a fashion statement like some 250+somethings. I have no desire to look like the Polish bicycle team or an Olympic swimmer. Ladies, if you are going to shop for a bikini, please take the BMI (Body Mass Index) chart (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_mass_index) with you! If you are in the 90th percentile, please shop for a one piece. Think of your family. Gentlemen, you’re not European and you’re not a world class swimmer, put the Speedo back on the rack and go look for something in a floral pattern that will end at the knee caps. Web netting inside is optional, unless your suit ends mid-thigh, then it is mandatory. Kids go to your pool for cryin’ out loud.